I'm scared.

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GreyWardenNatasha's avatar
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Um, hello. I don't really know how to start this entry..? I'm not one to usually talk about my personal feelings on something like this, something that anyone could read, but I really needed to talk about this and this was the first thing I thought of... I suppose.
So yeah, if you've read the title, I'm scared... 
Ugh, I know I'm going to regret this, but anyway. 
Recently I found out that I won't be attending the same high school that I've been attending for 5 years. I knew that this would happen. I knew. And I prepared myself the day before I found out; so that I wouldn't make a fool out of myself. To bad that went to waste because I made a fool out of myself anyway. I mean, I knew that I wouldn't get back into the school but yet when I found out... it was still such a shock to me. At first I was upset because I wouldn't get to see my favourite teachers anymore; my friends never occurred to me because I just knew that they wouldn't leave me alone. But... That's the problem. 
I'm beginning to be scared of losing them. I'm not doubting them! I'm not thinking that they're not going to talk to me anymore because they want to! I mean, they've all said that we'll meet up every week and that made me feel better but... Life's not that simple. These next few years are important for all of us. They'll see each other 5 days a week, sure, there would be classes and things in between but, they'll still all see each other at lunch and such. Soon they'll be too busy to talk to me.
I don't know why I'm so scared because we also all have a best friend that doesn't go to the same school, but we still all manage to make it work. I think that it's perhaps the feelings I have towards myself. I suppose I see myself as having things that people could hate me for; my loudness, selfishness or the fact that I can be frustrating to deal with.
I don't know. I'm just scared at the thought of losing my best friends. I've never had friends like them before, ever. I think that if I never saw them again, my life would be destroyed. 
I'm sorry, I just had to talk about this. 

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dreaminginlove's avatar
Our friendship, including Tori and everyone in our group, is so strong Tasha, that it cannot be taken away or broken or forgotten just because I do not see you as often. I know we will not drift apart, because I will not let it happen. I care too much about you to let you go. I love our talks and we have so much in common. I already miss your constant fangirl mode. 

I need you, we all do. Eventually we are all going to have to head off to different universities anyway, but forever after I am going to be keeping this friendship going. You will probably all be living in my house in at some stage because I like having someone around. I can't do things on my own xD

You are none of the things you said above, you are charming, sweet and cute. You are polite and considerate. I wish you all the best of luck tomorrow Natasha and we will meet up all the time, just at any excuse really. Once Lorna can drive, it will be constant piling into her back seat. :O